Key Topics and Causes of Anger
The page explains why children and teens get angry, noting common triggers such as unmet needs, stress, trauma, anxiety, misunderstandings, or unresolved conflicts. It stresses that all behavior is a form of communication and that children often mirror parental responses. For younger kids (under 5), it links to a separate page on toddler tantrums.
Age-Specific Advice
For 5-11 year olds: Parents are encouraged to model healthy anger expression (e.g., calmly voicing frustration or using coping strategies like deep breathing). Activities like creating an “anger firework” drawing help identify triggers and calming methods. De-escalation tips include listening without over-questioning, providing space, and using pre-agreed tools like a time-out word or safe outlets (e.g., hitting a cushion). Avoid threats that could erode trust, and apologise for parental slip-ups to teach accountability.
For 11-18 year olds: Recognise factors like sleep deprivation or information overload that exacerbate teen anger. Give space during outbursts if safe, check in later, and build connections through shared activities. Set clear boundaries against violence or abuse, explain its unacceptability calmly, and collaborate on strategies. Support siblings affected by the behaviour and encourage self-reflection in calm moments.
Three Steps of Anger Management
The core framework includes:
1. Recognise: Spot early physical or emotional signs of anger (e.g., racing heart or tense muscles).
2. Reflect: Explore underlying emotions and causes during calm times to build self-awareness.
3. Respond: Use techniques like assertive communication, mindfulness, exercise, hobbies, or routines to de-escalate and release tension.
General reminders include teaching empathy, avoiding verbal abuse or violence, and remembering that parents can guide safe expression while modelling positive behaviours.
Resources and Support
The page promotes Childline for children seeking confidential help 24/7 and the NSPCC Helpline for parents needing additional guidance. It underscores the importance of fostering trust so children feel safe seeking help, with key takeaways like understanding anger as masking vulnerability and using it as an opportunity to teach lifelong emotional regulation skills.
Thank you to the NSPCC for this useful information. For full details or further resources, please click HERE
